I don’t want kids, it doesn’t make me any less of a woman

Today, I’m going to talk about motherhood or more like un-motherhood.

I’m 24, I’ll be 25 in May and I decided years ago that I was never going to have kids and I still feel “womanly”. I mean the idea that a woman’s life is complete when she has a kid is grotesque. Plus, having a kid doesn’t make you a good “mother”.

When I say this, I get lots of mixed reactions, confusion, misunderstanding, etc. the picture above says it all. I’ve never had the “mother instinct”, I don’t automatically smile when I see a baby, plus I really think babies are ugly and a lot often creepy. We don’t say it out loud, but come on, doesn’t it feel awkward when the baby in the stroller next to you on the bus is just weirdly staring at you?!

The world is already overpopulated, I don’t feel the need to add on to that. I always hear, “you’re still young, wait till that hormone clock starts ticking and you’ll want to have kids” or even more ludicrous “come on, you have a uterus for a reason, so use it”, really, seriously? Who said that women are made whole when they push a human out of their body? I made a choice and I made it consciously and well aware, thank you. Who are you to explain to me how I should feel or use my body?

I have the utmost respect for mothers, hell, I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for my own, I think good ones do a great job. A job that is definitely not easy on a daily basis, and I think mothers deserve a lot of credit than what we give them, but I don’t believe in the motherhood archetype. I read this somewhere, and it echoes my thoughts, “Some of us end up parenting in other ways : we birth art, ideas, friendships, meaningful work and weird, wild love. We are each the GUARDIANS OF OUR OWN GREAT PURPOSE.”

So next time I say,”I will never have kids”, that is ME and the way I feel, so don’t judge me or try to convince me I should do my duty as a woman, I’ll be busy writing, and travelling, and making new friends and dreaming, thank you.

Until next time, stay positive.


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